Can You Feel That?!

That, my Christian friends, is the feeling of freedom!

Ahhh...that's all I can think today. What a relief!

I mentioned recently that I've been talking with a friend about our differing faiths. She told me yesterday that she doesn't want to talk about it any more. When she told me that...I felt a fear run through me. I had been so deeply contemplating her faith, wondering if it was true, praying, and reading...I was sort of putting myself in the mind-set that "if that's what I believed, then..." It was almost as if I WAS the same religion as her for a while. Since we weren't discussing it any longer, I felt I had to make a hard stand right then - do I accept it, or do I reject it? I reject it.

I'm not going to say what religion it is because it really doesn't matter one bit. What matters is that it was not founded on the rock of God's love and grace. It is founded on what people do...how they live...whether or not they're baptised "properly"...whether or not people follow certain rules set forth by them. After all of that is done, and people inevetably fail, THEN they need Jesus to save them.

As I "lived" that religion in my heart and head for a time...it just got so...HEAVY. I was working hard. I was spending so much time thinking about the way I'm living. I was spending so much time thinking about the image I was putting out there in the name of God. I was spending so much time...just working to be good enough. I was spending so much time focusing on me.

It finally came to a head last night. I sat on the couch and just cried my eyes out over how plain and ordinary and average and boring I am. And I'll tell ya what...if I'm going to try and do it on my own, that's all I'll ever be.

If I want an extraordinary life...then it can only be done through Jesus. Once I have him, THEN I can be amazing for him. Not the other way around. I set my eyes on Him first, then the "me" part will naturally follow.

I feel like I weigh about 2 pounds today! Wait, can a 2 pound something float? No? Well, then I feel lighter than 2 pounds.

There really is incredible and awesome freedom in Christ. And after getting a taste of what life would be like if I were trying to earn my way to being worthy of him...oh Lord, I am so very thankful for his grace.

And you wanna hear something even more amazing? That freedom in this life is only a small portion of the joy of following Christ! One day this body of mine will finally give out, and I'll leave it. So where will I go? I get to go be with Him...forever! What will Heaven be like? Honestly...I don't really know, and I don't really care. If I'm with Him then it's all good.