God's Daiquiri Story

I was raised to know God and the story of this Jesus who came to save.

I was "saved" as a young child of about 9 years old, one night after praying "....if I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take..."  After uttering those words, I felt that still small voice speak to me and say, "Do you?  Do you want to be mine?"  I whispered back a heartfelt, "yes"....and He moved into my heart that quiet night in Iowa as I lay under the covers of my little yellow Holly Hobby blanket.  I proceeded to live a mostly fruitless life, but I tried really hard to be "good".

Many years later in 1998, I began a painful and beautiful journey.  It felt like I was being bombarded by so many different "truths"....how could I really know what IS true?  If there is just one God, surely there must be one standard of truth....God's Truth.  I spoke to a  Catholic priest, a Lutheran minister, my parents, a Mormon from work, and an Evangelical Christian friend.  At one point or another during our conversations, all these different people mentioned one book at least once...the Bible.

How could this be?  The Bible was just a book of stories....hard to understand, seemingly contradictory....and the few pieces I could understand didn't make me like or trust God very much!

So I did what any self-respecting intelligent person would do....I se out to prove that the Bible couldn't be true.  That way, I could simply live my OWN "truth" and all would be settled.

I read.  I gathered piles of info (thank you, internet).  I talked.  I studied.  This went on for YEARS.  Five years.  I had reams of documents printed up.  I compared the Jewish holy book to our modern Bible....to the Catholic Bible....to the Mormon books....

To my utter frustration, I was not finding much success in disproving the Bible.  But I still wasn't really ready to accept it at TRUTH.   After all, it was so HARD to read....confusing...frustrating....made me angry every time I tried to read it!

And then one day, that still small voice spoke to me again.  Only it wasn't quite so still and small.  I envisioned myself at a crossroads.  I was perfectly free to choose either path I wanted, but those paths were headed in opposite directions....there was no "medium" or "sort of" middle road.  And that voice said, "Daiquiri, you know enough.  It's time to choose."  It was gentle, but it was firm.

I broke.

My pride, my "intelligence", my knowledge, my self-righteousness....all of it fell away and I got real with God.  Heart to heart.

"God, I don't understand you.  I don't understand this book of yours.  The pieces of that book that I do understand, make me feel like you're not very nice.  But I know this...there is a God, and I am not that God.  YOU are God.  I am not.  I don't know who you are or what you want with me, but I want to be yours.  I want to know you.  I want my life to have purpose and meaning.  Help me understand the Bible if that's how you want me to know you.  I give up.  From this point forward, I will stop fighting and just be all yours.  I'm scared of you and what you have for my life.  You, God....I want you to be my Lord."

There were no fireworks or thunderbolts.  Just an ocean of peace in my heart.  And love.... oh, God... it's as if God is a vast OCEAN of love, and He took one minuscule *drop* of His love and put it in my heart and mind.  For weeks, I was nearly crushed by the enormity of that one small drop of God-love in my heart.  I spend a lot of time praying and crying....in a good way....just trying to build up the muscle required to carry that little drop!

Needless to say, I've never been the same.  And thank God for that!

My first Easter after being "born again" (I can't think of a better way to describe it) was OVERWHELMING.....oh, this Jesus of mine!  What he did for me!  How much he loves me!  At the time, we were going to a big Christian church in Boise, Idaho (Calvary Chapel Boise), and they held their Easter service in the BSU Pavilion.  There was this little start-up artist who came to sing for us.....he had a single guitar, and his friend sat on a beat-box.  Those two people, those two instruments.....and man, I could NOT stop the tears.  The joy and love in my heart....I felt physically incapable of containing it all!

That little artist was Phil Wickham....if you listen to Christian radio these days, you know that God has done amazing things in his music career! :-)

Anyway....this whole post was intended to be a, "hey, check out this song....this is the guy who led worship my first Easter as a born-again Christian"....but I guess a little background was necessary ;-)

This is one of my favorite songs to this day....Divine Romance, indeed.  Your heart will never be the same if you lay it down at His feet.

Happy Easter weekend, friends. God loves you so very much.

xoxo Daiq

See the video here:  Divine Romance, Phil Wickham